FACT: A new road bike is pretty much useless on Christmas Day and no one does anything road bike related between Christmas and Valentine’s Day. While still waiting on news of the “working” deal, I don’t worry too much about having the bike by Christmas and waste countless hours on the internet deciding which (of the three) KOM’s on the website to go with and like all bike geeks endlessly compare side-by-side photos of Easton and DT Swiss wheels with the photos of the frame that I found on the United Healthcare Pro Cycling Team website. Floyd is also most likely waiting on news of his “working” deal.
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
Monday, March 29, 2010
With rain looming in the forecast, Friday afternoon, before Sunday’s Ohio Valley road race, there were five times as many Cat 5’s pre-registered as compared to those in the 1/2/3’s. As a public service to those new to road racing and those old dogs that can’t learn new tricks, The Best Bike Blog Ever offers a crash course in Meteorology for Bike Races 101. Normally this education takes 10 races to master, coincidently the same amount of races necessary to upgrade to Cat 4, but we will drop it on you in one easy to follow eight lesson online course.
Thursday, March 25, 2010
Monday, March 22, 2010
Friday, March 12, 2010
“Hey good lookin’ we’ll be back to pick ya up later!” Of course my younger readers might not remember this Karaoke precursor gem of a commercial with all the quality of a bad Saturday Night Live skit, but the quote from the Mister Microphone guy in the convertible is forever engrained in the hard drive of my brain in the same folder as the file for the Chia Pet jingle. It’s so funny I want to say it again, wink and point my finger at you, “Hey good lookin’ we’ll be back to pick ya up later!” Hang on. Let me wipe the laughing tear from my cheek before it drips on the keyboard.
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
TBBBE: Why should we vote for your design, US19?
NT: Free handlebar rides for everyone if I win!
TBBBE: Woot! Do you have formal training as a bike fashion designer, or do you have a natural flair for fashion?
(Nick's Hopefully Bike Winning Ridley Design Pictured Above)
NT: It's a little too repetitive for my tastes, kind of like Specialized (the NASCAR of the cycling world). We get it. We know it’s a Specialized. The other 15 logos told us.
NT: I do not have any formal training as a bike fashion designer, but if you know where I could find that kind of program, I would consider an online degree. I have a degree in industrial design, which is basically a product designer.
TBBBE: Italian espresso, Belgian waffles, French wine...where did your inspiration for this design come from?
NT: Belgian waffles with an espresso reduction drizzled over the top...
TBBBE: Speaking of taste, about your design, we think it’s the best, not because you’re a fan of the blog, but because it actually shows a good eye for balance and restraint. Can you tell us more about it and why you decided not to put any blue on the stem, hoods or bar tape?
NT: I think a successful paint scheme works with the shape and lines of the frame. The Noah has some subtle curves that I wanted to highlight, as well as the integrated seat mast. I kept the cockpit all white because the cycling world probably has another couple years till white is not the lustiest color of the peloton. If this was my personal bike, I'd have blue or black tape on till Memorial Day. Just like white slacks and seersucker, you only rock white tape in the summer time.
TBBBE: Right on brotha froma nutha mutha. Let’s talk about some of your competition. US08’s design is on the brink of giving people seizures, like someone wrapped yesterday’s edition Le Equipe on the top tube. It also lacks balance between the blue Ridley logos on the lower part of the bike and the red logo on the seat. What are your thoughts on US08?
TBBBE: Oh my gawf…uh excuse me. (recovering from spit-take after Specialized slam.) Okay. According to The Best Bike Blog Ever reporters at Paris Fashion Week, the trendy colors for bikes this season are red, black and white…why did you buck the trend with the blue and white motif?
NT: That is funny, because main stream fashion moves so quickly, but the cycling world moves sooooo slow. I mean it only took 3 years for white components to catch on, right? Black and red will always be a safe choice, but there is so much more out there. Trek is doing some cool color schemes, and there are some cool custom stuff going on at the NAHMBS (also a lot of fugly stuff, too). As much as I try and draw inspiration from other places, you still can't go wrong with the euro peloton.
TBBBE: While we’re on the subject of 2010’s trendy colors of red, black and white, let’s take a look at another competitor, US83. While we applaud the designer for a creation with more mass appeal, we also bitch slap them for not being more fashion forward. Thoughts?
TBBBE: Which pro cyclist would you choose to model your creation and why?
NT: I would say Mario Cippolini, because he just exuded style and cockiness in his day (photo at left), but I am afraid as to what sort things my bike might pick up from him. Tom Boonen is quite the hard man, but I didn't design in a coke mirror on the stem. I'd have to go with Robbie McEwen or Mark Cavendish.
TBBBE: Looking at the 3rd of your 4 competitors, US31’s is a well balanced design, but a little too, what’s the word….”German Tattoo” for our taste. Also, the Best Bike Blog Ever’s persnickety bike fashion police have noticed a fashion faux paux. All the cable housings are yellow except for the rear brake. Tisk tisk. Do you agree US31 is lacking an attention to detail?
TBBBE: Seeing how he’s an expert at all things Ridley, The Best Bike Blog Ever has asked Ridley The Cyclocross Wonder Dog to comment on your Ridley bike design. What do you think the Wonder Dog will say?
NT: I think that he would mount up on the rear wheel out of admiration and dog-like dominance play.
RTCWD: (Unfortunately, at the time of publishing Ridley The Cyclocross Wonder Dog was in the backyard and still unavailable for comment and/or the pee of approval.) If you'd like to have a cyclocross wonder dog as a Facebook friend, click here.
TBBBE: Cocked. (giggle)
NT: I think that this design could be in production at most any bike company out there right now, but it doesn't push the boundaries.
TBBBE: We know you’ve dabbled in painting some of your other bikes in real life, bikes that probably had a decent factory paint job to begin with. Tell us about your favorite homegrown creation. What type of bike and process did you use?
NT: Three bikes come to mind: the first is a Kona Major Jake Cylocross frame. I painted it white with a blue pearl over the top. I applied some custom decals that I made from a home hobby kit. The frame was topped off with so much clear coat that I struggled to get the seat collar on! The second…is one that I painted for one of my best buds, who first got me into cycling. It was a Bianchi San Lorenzo that I designed and painted with a subtle inspiration of the Ohio State Buckeyes. I painted it with over the counter acrylic lacquers from the auto parts store, or as I like to call it "rattle can" style. The best part of this paint job was that we designed a custom team kit to match. The last bike that comes to mind is one that I just got done building up. (Pictured Above) I bought a no-name aluminum frame and painted it with a paint job that would match my team's (Darkhorse) new kits (which has a) cowboy motif.
TBBBE: Good luck my friend. And readers please do Nick a favor, click on this link to the Design Your Ridley Competition and vote for Nick’s blue and white design. US19 baby! Voting ends March 19th, 2010.
Monday, March 8, 2010
Put it this way, if you don't recognize the pills on the left, you're not on Team Flomax...yet. For anyone too young to be on Team Flomax, which I realize is somewhat subjective, the same principal that makes it completely lame to win any competition versus a 2 year old also makes it a chump move to outsprint or drop someone who is taking more money out of their 401k than you’re putting in. Essentially, if you’re on a group ride with a soon to be senior and you're not one, you’re fucked. And, they fuckin’ know it.
The county sprint sign loomed over the next riser. As the pace stepped up a notch and then another, the lead-out man of Team Flomax made his move with his captain in tow. That’s as irresistible to a cyclist as a moving ribbon to a cat. Instinctively, I clawed onto the train. It left the station too early. Their cars derailed and I came around and nabbed the honors with a good two bike lengths to spare!
So, how’s it feel to beat up on a guy who turns 60 this year? He asked with a quizzical twinkle of sarcasm in his eye. With one line, the fucker let the air out of my tires. I can call him fucker because I’ve ridden with him enough times to have earned the privilege. And, the fucker just played the AARP card. Old fuckers also enjoy being fuckers. Out of breath because I actually used every ounce of energy I had to beat their asses, “Fuck I’m 42,” I said. The last spec of jubilation drained from my brain and was replaced with a good ‘old dose of catholic guilt and humility. No quip of a comeback in mind, fuck, I thought. “Shit he’s 55? Tom, how old are you?” He asked another guy continuing to twist the knife he jabbed in my ego. Tom shouted back,” 53” or something like that. “What? You still out of breath,” he niggled me again. Son of a bitch, I thought. Older guys love being fuckers and I fuckin’ love it.
One day I’ll be a fucker too.
Thursday, March 4, 2010
At this time, as a community service to those that may be considered “inside people,” The Best Bike Blog Ever would like to offer a blanket advance apology for the amount of what you would call “idiots” on the roads and sidewalks and bike paths this weekend. A mile is 5280 feet, and no doubt on average you’ll encounter at least 5281 idiots per mile. These so called idiots will likely include: runners, walkers, skateboarders, cyclists, dog-walkers and that one guy in town who has figured out how to combine all of the aforementioned outdoor activities into one with his urban dog sled. Those near neighborhood parks should be on the lookout for the errant Frisbee or over zealous unleashed pooch. To avoid the idiots, Inside People are advised right now to stock up with plenty of smokes, butter, salt, cheesy poofs, shortening, Lil Kings, and gasoline at your local Krogers (the “s” added on purpose) before sunrise on Saturday, March 5th. Once again, this Inland Tsunami warning for The Greater Cincinnati area, and other areas south expected to experience temperatures at least 20 degrees warmer than the past few weeks, will expire at sunset on Sunday March 6th. Thank you for your cooperation.